


The Art of Apology

by sunset_oasis



Series: every you, every me [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M, canon AU, mild angst with optimistic ending, sequel to "The Art of Dueling", takes place about 2 years later
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-06
Updated: 2017-05-06
Packaged: 2018-10-28 17:27:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10835925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunset_oasis/pseuds/sunset_oasis
Summary: Sequel toThe Art of Dueling.  A revelation from an oblivation-detection wrist ring led Theo to investigate how exactly he'd been obliviated two years ago.





	The Art of Apology

**Author's Note:**

> disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

He didn't really expect anything to show up as he curiously tried out the obliviation-detection wrist ring, one of the many heirlooms left to his father by his aunt after her death two years ago. Life, it turned out, was full of surprises. Theo stared at the wrist ring that turned bright red, and a line of date started forming.

1994/09/22

_What the hell?!_

He closed his eyes and tried to remember … this was sometime in the first semester of their fourth year. The year of the Triwizard Tournament … did this have anything to do with _that_? He wondered to himself. But it seemed … unlikely.

It was at the start of the term too … which meant the Slytherin Annual Duel was probably going on then. He paused a bit. This probably had more chance to do with the obliviation thing than Triwizard Tournament – there were often a lot of schemes going on during the Annual Duel season. It had always been some kind of tradition of their house.

But still, obliviation? Most schemes didn't usually involve an attack on memory. He wondered what had he been obliviated of. Frowning hard, he tried to remember the duel of that year. He'd faced off Pansy in the first round and lost – it was during that duel he'd found out that Pansy knew a lot of seventh-year level dueling spells. Well, he _had_ been suspecting Granger might be secretly tutoring her or something, so it hadn't been much of a surprise.

He frowned. Perhaps he'd somehow found out what Granger had been teaching Pansy at that time, and they'd obliviated him so he wouldn't know what spells they'd been practicing? Well, he wouldn't put it past Pansy to do that, he supposed. In fact, that indeed sounded quite like her.

He was a bit annoyed, but then that's all part of the game, really. The duel wasn't just the time firing spells at each other on the platform, sometimes it was about the things happening off-stage, too. If it was Pansy, however this revelation might've pissed him off, he supposed he could _sort of_ understand a little. And impressed at how sneaky and cunning she was. Still, that didn't mean he could just completely ignore this all – so he might be a little petty and held onto grudges a little too long but hey this was _his_ memory, he was permitted to be a little pissed off at losing it and it was definitely justifiable if he wanted to hex her a bit for it or something.

Though, knowing Pansy, she'd probably block his spell easily and laugh and tell him to not be a sore loser. And maybe add some quote like "All's fair in love and war."

Theo shook his head irritably. While this seemed like quite a plausible explanation, it didn't mean it was the truth. He might be completely off. Though considering the circumstances, he didn't think so. It wasn't as if anybody else had any motives except her. He paused a bit – well, technically, they _could_ have, and he'd just _forgotten_ about it.

He sighed. As much as he wanted to confront Pansy, he didn't want to do it without nothing but guesses. Maybe he should talk to Blaise first and ask for some advice – Blaise was usually pretty good at solving mysteries.

 

* * *

 

"Hey, love," Blaise drawled as Theo stepped through the floo and arrived at the Zabini Villa. After being a classmate more than 5 years and dating a little more than 3 months, he'd learned to observe Theo pretty well. And now, his boyfriend seemed to be worried – no, not worried, more like … trying hard to figure out something.

"Everything alright?" He asked, concerned.

"Well," Theo hesitated. "No. Um. Yes. I mean – nothing that I think would be of immediate worries. Or any worries in the future, I guess."

Blaise raised an eyebrow at how Theo phrased the sentence, intrigued. "Oh?"

Theo tossed something that looked like a wrist ring onto the table while walking to sit beside Blaise, not noticing Blaise's eyes flashed for a moment. Blaise's heart sped up just a little faster, but his face was already its usual calm when Theo sat down. This couldn't be …? Damn, he couldn't've found out, could he?

"You know about the oblivation-detection wrist ring?" Theo asked, leaning onto Blaise.

Blaise tried his best not to stiffen at the question. The memory of that day when he'd obliviated Theo flashed back to his brain, painfully clear. But gauging from Theo's reaction, he probably didn't know it was Blaise. Yet. _Or_ maybe he knew and was trying to see how Blaise would react to all this. "Heard of it," Blaise replied, keeping his tone neutral. "How'd you get this?"

"My aunt left it to my dad after she died. I was helping him going through some stuff these past few weeks, he wanted to clean some things out and maybe sell the things that we don't need," Theo said. "But that's not the point – look," he put the wrist ring on, and it glowed bright red as a line of date appeared. He turned to look at Blaise, and Blaise immediately faked a convincing surprise.

"Is it … the date of your obliviation?" he asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

"I think it should be, that's how I remember this kind of stuff to work, anyway," Theo sighed. "I think it's probably Pansy – you remember how I dueled her that year? But I want to talk to someone about my guesses before confronting her. I don't know, maybe I'm making a big mistake."

_You are,_ Blaise thought as he felt his throat suddenly dried. He wanted to be able to stop the time and analyze the whole situation before deciding on the next course of action.

True, Theo might believe it was Pansy now, but he'd probably found out soon enough it wasn't, were he decided to investigate. Because Pansy and Granger would probably be offended at the wrong accusations and get involved and … it was probably only a matter of time before they discovered the truth. Maybe he could try to frame someone else, but what was to guarantee Theo wouldn't find out eventually?

He wished he'd had more time to devise plans and compare them and analyze the success rates before having to make the decision now. If it were anyone else, it probably didn't matter as much, as he didn't care for them. If it were any other person, breaking up wouldn't be painful much, to be honest.

But Theo – Theo was different. Blaise genuinely liked Theo. Maybe more than a bit liked. Merlin, if he messed this up – if he lied now and Theo discovered the truth eventually – considering how smart Theo was, that was highly likely – Blaise would definitely lose him. Not that he was 100% sure he could keep Theo by being honest.

_"_ _I'm rather good at figuring out stuff,"_ he still remembered what Theo had said that day.

And he couldn't really risk obliviating Theo again because now Theo that damned ring … it'd probably make things worse.

Theo was looking at him, and Blaise realized, nervously, that he might've been thinking a bit too long … and just like how good Blaise was at observing Theo, the vice versa also held, too.

_Fuck._

He needed to say something. Right now, or –

Theo narrowed his eyes and said slowly, "Did you know Pansy did it and never told me?"

"No," Blaise said immediately. _That_ wasn't a lie. Because Pansy _hadn't_ done it.

Theo was still frowning.

Fuck, he should've said yes. Then again, probably not. He didn't want to cross the Parkinson-Granger duo.

He knew, rationally, what decision would probably minimize the damage now. But somehow, he didn't seem to be able to summon enough courage, and a confession stuck at his throat, refusing to get out.

Theo's frowned deepened. Blaise bit his lips, and finally said something, something true, and something to try to buy himself more time. "I'm not covering up anything for Pansy." He repeated, trying his best to sound sincere. This part was easy.

Theo stilled, and Blaise could practically hear Theo thinking, the wheels in his brain spinning.

_Now comes the hard part_ , he grimaced to himself. He tried to remind himself that this was rationally the best decision of minimum damage, but words stuck in his throat and he was not his usual brilliant-at-lying self as they stared at each other and Blaise could see that Theo, while probably not at the correct conclusion yet, was heading in the right direction.

"It's not Pansy," Blaise heard himself said, feeling oddly detached. "It's -" _why was this so damn hard?_ "I'm sorry," his voice cracked.

Theo stared at him intently, and Blaise dropped his gaze. Slowly, Theo said, "I'm going to wager a guess, that the sorry isn't exactly an _I-know-who-it-is-but-can't-tell-you_ sorry."

"You're always good at figuring out stuff," Blaise said, voice taut.

Theo said nothing. Blaise slowly looked up into his boyfriend's eyes, filled with suspicion and suppressed anger.

Blaise swallowed, and said the words that he suspected Theo already figured out by now. "It's me. I'm sorry."

"So I figured," Theo replied coolly.

_He's always been good at figuring out stuff,_ Blaise thought, the phrase somehow made him want to cry, like echoing some distant memory, of how Theo had said those words back then, which, ironically, he couldn't remember now because Blaise had obliviated him.

The ensuing silence was almost deafening.

A minute passed, and Theo said, his voice still cool, "In case _you_ haven't _figured_ this out, I'm kind of, like, waiting for an explanation."

It took Blaise every restraint he had to stop himself from automatically responding, "Well, in case _you_ haven't _figured_ this out, I'm kind of like, trying to avoid giving one." He was glad that ultimately, he still had more self-control than sass.

Merlin, he wanted to punch himself. _Or I should probably let Theo do it,_ he thought with a sigh. _Well, lesson learned –_ _don't date anyone you've obliviated before, unless you're certain they wouldn't find it out._

"It'll be clearer if I let you … view my memory, I guess," Blaise offered quietly. Blaise wasn't sure if he wanted to talk about it, to relive it again – he already felt guilty enough. He had tried to not think into the deeper details of the incident, forcing it to the back of his mind so he wouldn't have to deal with his inner conflict guilt. What was worse, a part of him was arguing that since they hadn't been dating then, they hadn't exactly been close friends, and it was perfectly rational decision. Another voice berated the first voice for even considering that, but Blaise couldn't help it.

Something flickered in Theo's eyes, Blaise wasn't sure what it was. Hesitation? "Fine. But I want to _hear_ it from you first."

Blaise suspected Theo knew Blaise was trying to avoid having to actually talk about it himself by offering the memory. Which was, Blaise supposed, why Theo was asking to hear it directly. Not that Blaise didn't owe him an explanation.

"I – it's about me and Draco's duel," Blaise began slowly.

Theo frowned, and Blaise could see his expression wondering what _that_ had to do with him.

"You remember that Draco won, yes?" Theo nodded curtly at Blaise's question. Blaise continued. "Well … and there were some rumors about how he only won because he bribed me to let him win. Mostly in the upper years. The rumors died down soon though, as other exciting things happened during the dueling season."

"I remembered the rumors," Theo said slowly, "Draco said it's probably started by Warrington and Bletchley, as their families never got along with his, and they probably would jump at any chance to defame him."

It wasn't completely untrue, in a way. Considering Warrington and Bletchley, even if Blaise hadn't pulled the trickery, they might've started this about Draco anyway. So it was a plausible explanation for Theo to go after, when his original suspicions and observations on the event had been obliviated. (Blaise's mother was rather good at obliviating, and had taught him the spell. He'd known how to obliviate memories relating to certain events ever since he'd been 12.)

"The truth is … Draco hadn't bribed me, of course. He won, fair and square, but … " Blaise drew a deep breath. "He's going to win anyway, I could tell it, but I don't think the crowds could, at least, for those who didn't know the full extent of how well he could duel. And I … deliberately made a quite amateur mistake so people would suspected I did it on purpose because he bribed me to lose, or something."

Blaise forced himself to meet Theo's eyes, it was hard but he managed – although he did wince a bit at Theo's cool gaze – and said, "You found out the truth and confronted me. You're the only one – I obliviated you."

"I see," Theo said, slowly and quietly. Then he asked, "Do you regret it? The truth, please, Blaise."

Blaise felt like he should say 'yes', because there seemed to be only correct answer to this kind of question, right? Regardless of whether that was true or not. And he should be sorry about it, he should regret it. He _did,_ in a way, but not totally. He regretted having done this to Theo, having taken a part of memory from him, yes, but given the circumstances back then, he still believed it was a logical decision.

A part of him was angry at himself for think of this, for the need to even _hesitate_ at this question. Another part defiantly retorted with the sharp question that ' _if it had been any other person, would you still regret it?_ ' Blaise was quite certain that he wouldn't.

"I'm really sorry I did this to you." Blaise finally said. "I really am …"

They both sensed some sort of unspoken 'but' at the end of the sentence, and Theo waited patiently.

"I'm sorry," Blaise repeated, his voice low. "Maybe you'd like to see the memory now?"

Theo gazed at him shrewdly, before saying, "Maybe you'd like to finish your previous sentence?"

He should've known that _of course_ Theo would realize there was more to what he'd said. He'd always liked how insightful Theo was, after all. (It'd also ironically been Theo's insightfulness that led them to now, in a way.)

"I sorry I did this to you," Blaise finally said, after a few moments of silence. He wondered why he was being honest about this now. Honesty was never how he dealt with things. "And I'll never deceive you like this or obliviate you again. But it's only because it's you."

"Because we're dating." Theo stated flatly.

Blaise hesitated, and shook his head. "A bit more than that. Because, well – I care. About you. So I regretted that I've ever hurt you or … taken your memories away. But in some sense, it _was_ a rational decision at that time. You and I know both how the duels could be, with everyone trying to win, the battles and scheming aren't just the ones on the platform. We – we weren't exactly _friends_ back then, Theo. You're likely to have done the same if the roles were reversed."

Merlin, he _sucked_ at this, Blaise realized. No one went about apologizing like this, it sounded like excuses mixed with accusations and Blaise wondered why he was so foolishly doing it. He really should've just apologized and groveled and –

"I'm not happy about this," Theo said warily, "in fact, I'm still pissed. But, weirdly, I understand what you're talking about."

Blaise looked unsure about how he should respond, before saying, "Thank you."

"I haven't forgiven you," Theo narrowed his eyes at him, slightly annoyed.

"I know," Blaise hastened. "Just – thanks for understanding."

Theo closed his eyes and leant back against the sofa, and sighed, "Well, thanks for being honest. I …"

"… Wasn't expecting it?" Blaise guessed, grimly amused despite himself. Theo said nothing as he opened his eyes again to look at Blaise, but Blaise understood. "Well, I kind of surprised myself too. But I – I owe you the truth, I think. Isn't that the whole point of this?" Blaise made a vague gesture. He hesitated. He wondered if he'd already screwed all his chances by his rare honesty, but maybe, _maybe_ there was just a small chance to be forgiven if he decided to go all the way with honesty. He'd already said this much, anyway. "You deserve the truth. I wanted to show you that I've – _we_ 've changed, since fourth year. I deceived you then, but I'm … I'm not going to do that again to _you_. I mean, we probably both know that I won't hesitate more than a second to manipulate or lie to most people. And, frankly, neither will you. But I want you to know you're not _most people_ to me. You're … _special_."

There, he'd said it. A few hours ago Blaise wouldn't believe himself capable of such naked honesty. This was either going to save him, or completely screw all his remaining chances. He still wasn't completely sure the truthfulness was better than simply profusely apologizing, expressing regret without giving what might seem like excuses.

Theo rubbed his face, and studied Blaise. Blaise tried not to squirm under his gaze. Finally, Theo said, "Could I see your memory?"

Blaise nodded, "I'll fetch the pensieve."

 

* * *

 

Five minutes later, Theo emerged from the pensive. He met Blaise's gaze, noticing Blaise's slight nervousness. Truth be told, he was kind of – impressed with how Blaise had skillfully done all of that when they'd been just fourth years. It was quite clever, all things considering. He was still a bit angry, but that didn't mean he didn't marvel at Blaise's cleverness. He'd always loved Blaise's clever and cunning and even his manipulation skills. He just wished he himself hadn't been the one to be tricked, but Theo had to admit Blaise _did_ have a point when he said they weren't friends back then.

"You're pretty good at it," Theo finally said. "The whole plotting and lying and manipulation stuff."

"Well, everyone has their own talent. Yours is detective skills." Blaise replied, carefully. He continued, trying to be as honest and sincere as he could, "I'm not going to change who I am. But you're – you're not _other people_ to me like two years ago, and that's the – that's the difference."

Theo had never seen Blaise opened up this much to anyone before, and he felt oddly touched. He wondered if that showed on his face. He sighed, "No more obliviation or lying or trickery between us, okay?"

Something flashed across Blaise face, and Theo raised an eyebrow at him expectantly as he noticed.

Blaise hesitated a moment, before saying, sounding a little embarrassed, "You said us."

_Oh_.

Theo sighed. "I'm not breaking up with you, Blaise."

"Thank you," Blaise said, his voice small. "Let me make it up to you, please?"

At that, Theo felt some emotion stirred inside him, something not exactly familiar but _warm_ and _fond,_ like untangling a twisted knot inside his chest, and he felt his previous anger and irritation subsiding. Gently, Theo wrapped his arm around Blaise's shoulders, and felt Blaise tensed up slightly, but neither of them pulled away.

He gave Blaise a small smile, "Okay," and Blaise smiled back, tentatively, hesitantly, and at that moment Theo just _knew_ , that everything was going to be alright.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on [tumblr](http://ff-sunset-oasis.tumblr.com)


End file.
